Good Grief

This last week has been a trying one. Biggie didn’t want to come in most of the day on Wednesday, so he sat underneath the trampoline. A few hours later, my daughter, Lauryn, found him laying motionless in the front yard. The kitchen light spread over him like a blanket. You wouldn’t have been able to see him unless you went outside. It happened quickly…too soon. He was the sweetest of our two dogs.

Our black lab, Creed is distraught, you can see it in his eyes. He doesn’t know how to handle grief and I have learned that I don’t either. Biggie was alive and now his soul is somewhere else. It makes my heart ache to no longer see him snuggled up to one my older daughters. He had a deep love for them.

A part of our every day life. We adopted Biggie from our local animal shelter almost 4 years ago. He had come from an abusive home and had a scar down the middle of his head. We adopted him one day before he was going to be “put to sleep.” He wasn’t just a dog. He was a family member who will be truly missed.

I grow existential during times like these. When grief strikes, my world stops. I get lost in thought. What are we doing? What am I doing? What is my purpose? Yes, I struggle with these things even though I have said over and over that I know what my purpose is. It is so easy to lose sight of that. We have so many things we worry about in this life, things that weigh us down, but when it comes down to it what is it in our lives that supersedes all the bull crap we experience in this life?

I think it’s all about the connections. It’s the whole reason people are missed when they leave to where ever it is they go. We go into nostalgia mode. I am grateful for those moments.

One thing I learned about grief is that it helps me to remember what’s important and allows for the stupid nonsensical junk to fall by the wayside.

My challenge to you is to make time today and everyday for those whom are important in your life. You just never know when it will be the last time you get to give them one last kiss, hug, or to say, “I love you.”